This past week has been by far the hardest thing I have ever had to go through. I cried the most I have have ever cried and prayed the most I have ever prayed.
I am not the best long story teller. I tend to ramble and get side tracked so I am going to break up
Ronin's story into a few separate posts.
The delivery dayThe day started out perfect. I woke up at 6am and it felt like it was Christmas morning. I was beyond happy the day had finally come where I would get to meet my son. I couldn't wait. Our almost two year old son Max came into our room and snuggled with my husband and I. As I looked over at my sweet little family I was just thinking how incredibly blessed I was and it was all about to get even better.
We arrived at the hospital at 10 am to check in. I was starting to get nervous. I am the type who needs a Xanax before the dentist so I was just waiting for that horrible anxiety to kick in.
I entered the pre-op room where I changed into my gown. A nurse came in and put my iv in. That's when the nerves started. I started shaking like a leaf as I anxiously awaited 12pm (go time) to roll around. My amazing husband said prayers with me kissed me telling me everything was going to go great.
It was now 11:45 and all the nurses and my doctor came in and said they were ready for me to come back. I was so scared.
I entered the sterile bright room, which seemed to even hum a sterile sound. I told myself not to look around because if I saw any tools I knew I would freak out.
My anesthesiologist came in. He reminded me of a slightly stoned yoga teacher, which put me at ease. I told him how nervous I was and he told me not to worry. He said after the baby comes out he would give me "special juice" to calm me down. I liked the sound of that. I sat on the edge of the bed squeezing my nurses hands as he inserted my spinal. All I remember is a cold sensation followed by my legs feeling like tree trunks and I could no longer wiggle my toes. I did a quick self test and pinched my inner thigh really hard. I couldn't feel a thing! Whew!
I laid down, the curtain went up and my husband came in and sat by my side. My doctor entered the room and told me I was about to meet my son! I kind of went into a zen mode and don't remember much after that.
I laid there waiting as my belly was pushed and tugged around. I heard my doctor ask for a tool and said "He's a big boy, I need to make the incision longer." I didn't care about how long my incision was I just wanted to hear him cry.
After what seemed like an eternity I heard them suctioning followed by the best sound in the world...his cry!
They quickly showed him to me, I gave him a kiss and then he was whisked off to be checked out. As I was getting wheeled off to the recovery room I asked if I could see him in the nursery (they usually do not allow this when you just had a c-section). My awesome nurse told me we could take a quick peek. I pushed it a little further and asked if I could hold him for just a sec. I held him for about a minute and then handed him over to finish getting checked out. He was perfect and all I could think about was that first bonding moment where he would lay on my chest skin to skin.
As I was in the recovery room. My husband came in and told me Ronin was having a hard time stabilizing his blood sugar, which can be an after result of me being type 1 diabetic. The same thing happened to my first born son, but it was all corrected within an hour or so.
My husband was with our son while I was in my room, praying his blood sugar would rise. A nurse walked in with my husband and told me the
last thing in the world I wanted to hear. She said my son's blood sugar level was so low that he would have to get transported immediately to San Diego Children's hospital NICU unit. A hospital that was about an hour away from the one where I delivered.
I would not be going with him. I had not even held him for more than a minute. Words can not even describe how I felt at that moment. Tears filled my eyes and I was hysterical. My husband and I prayed as we knew our sweet baby was about to be in the hands of someone else.
Part two will be next--Ronin's pick up and arrival into NICU.
On a side note: This story does have a happy ending. Ronin is now home with us and is doing great! He is one content little guy.
Eating cherries like they are going out of style.
Enjoying sweet little newborn snuggle moments.
Beautiful flowers sent from my best friend who lives all the way in Maui. Miss her!
It's no secret my makeup has been collecting dust these past few weeks, but these two recent mascara purchases are awesome! They can be found here and here.
Max turns two in less than two weeks! The theme for his party is going to be Toy Story. He is obsessed.
